Category Archives: Women

Affirmations for positivity

affirmations

Affirmations for positive vibrations are needed now more than ever. Holiday blues and post-election woes have gotten us down. Rude and racist people are coming out of their closets. I noticed that my snap back timing has been off. When someone was rude to me, I was stunned. I didn’t have a quick comeback. It took me a moment to regroup.

Snap back: Recently, at an event for small business owners and an art exhibit launch, an angry woman with cornrowed bangs stood over me, pointed a finger and snapped. She was rude and racist. “How could you side with those immigrants when your own sisters can barely survive? They are working for minimum wage at Mickey Ds trying to raise a family with four kids. And you want the immigrants to get more?”  Where did that come from, I thought.

affirmations

I was seated with two other black women having wine and cheese. During small talk, the famed Waldorf Astoria Hotel closing and layoffs came up. Miss Angry Lady, who was not part of our conversation but standing nearby, chimed in: “I’m glad they got fired! Those immigrant washroom workers were paid $25 an hour. They will get $130,000 severance pay! I’m glad Trump got elected. He helped a lot of black people, especially rappers like P. Diddy become rich and successful!”

So, I said something lame like: “Oh wow, that’s not right!”  She shot back at me: “Oh, you must be one of those Spanish-speaking types!” I shot back: “What does that matter?”  She snapped: “You know, I’m tired of bitches like you. Kiss my black ass!” She walked away.

I was stunned. I looked to my companions. They consoled me. “Girl, don’t worry about her. We should have warned you. She’s kind of cre-cre.”

As a native New Yorker, my radar for crazy people is finely tuned. But the atmosphere of the elegant Municipal Building art galley and the wine must have put me at ease.

Angry lady was lucky she got me. Had she run into my sister, it would have been a different story. There would have been a rumble. My baby sister, who is twice my size, inherited the family’s drama genes. She has a short fuse and relishes a public street scene. When we were kids, I used to threaten playmates with her: “Don’t let me call my ‘Karate Ca-razy’ sister on you!

affirmations

Razor’s Edge: When I got home, I didn’t tell my husband. I was too upset. Over dinner the next day I told him. He chuckled and knowingly shook his head. “Everybody’s on razor’s edge since the election,” he said. In his 80-plus years on this earth he said he has seen his own share of angry black women. “It’s not myth! It’s truth. Black women have every right and good reasons to be angry,” he said.

Angry black women: Check out insightful counseling segments about angry black women with TV host Iyanla Vanzant. “A white woman’s emotional reactions, regardless of how outlandish or inappropriate, are perceived differently than those of black women. When white women express their emotional state, it is perceived as a “bad hair day” or perhaps, a hormonal imbalance.” Click here to read more.

Furthermore, some black women proudly own their ‘angry black woman’ journey. “Because I was in 8th grade the first time I was called an Oreo and told that I “wasn’t really black” like it was a compliment.” To read more, click here.

affirmations

Affirmations can help and heal. Here are a few of my favorites from the Happy Black Woman site:

  1. I choose to radiate love, joy & gratitude today. I know life is too short to dwell on negativity. I walk in the light!
  2. I am calm in the face of conflict. I brush annoyances off quickly & easily. I agree to disagree. I am bigger than that!  Click here for more affirmations.

Do you have positive affirmations? Please share.

 

 

 

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